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♂♀Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Colorful Rainbow

There are lots of things came to my mind as i do my self-reflection. Like my relationship and my life. Well, last time i disliked doing self-reflection cos i don't really want to or should i say i don't wish to think alot or maybe also running from the fact. But i guess as times goes by, doing self-reflection actually make you grow and learn. For the past few weeks, i was really depressed and suppressing my feeling esp on this area of r/s.It's really a BIG BLOW to me. I remember that night i was super duper sad and keep on crying. My mood swing all the way to the lowest ground and didn't have any appetite for dinner. All I want is to be inside my world without anyone disturbing and even thought of wishing in a coma state. haha!! sound emo ya. At the point of time, i keep on blaming myself and thinking how useless i was. A totally silly girl i would say and even daniel saying that too. It make me feel so upset. But now i'm kind of like feeling better each day. Everyday i've to keep telling myself that he's gone and we are no longer together anymore. I've struggled so hard whether to share with ms kau ant then questioning myself why m i struggling to share? perphaps i was rather comfortable staying in my circle zone not knowing that at all. But that was not what i want in the first place, all along i have been telling myself to move on with my life but yet i wasn't and i was feeling totally so emotional. I've came to realised that my emotional was so overwhelming each time that it's actually blinded my rational and behaving like a crazy fellow. Well, i hope i will continues stay in a "better" state. To apply to r/s: Guys are like a light bulb, once you switch off which mean no light at all while girls are like a iron once you switch off, its still hot and take times to cool down. Likewise in r/s guys (not all guys but majority) shut off everything once the r/s end and will not be bother to think about it anymore.
God does not promise you a life free from pain and suffering just because you believe in Him. If those who believed in God never experienced hurt other people would see God only as a magician who takes away pain. The difference is that you have a relationship with God, who helps, comforts you, and sometimes even miraculously heals your hurts. But most important, you have a God who will take away all of your hurts when you arrive in heaven. Whatever pain you are experiencing is temporary. One day it will end, perhaps here on earth but certainly in eternity.
I've been thinking alot lately, about what is my values in life and my purpose. Well, i'm kind of know what is my values in life. Life without values is just like a shell without a body. I'm seeing people who lives their days without any purpose or values at all and not knowing what do they want. People would say my purpose is to earn so much money as possible but is that really a purpose in life that we are living for? isn't that just a goal or aim? Guess i'm still in the process of re-thinking again n again.

YES!! FINALLY BELOVED QUEENIE SENT ME E PHOTOS WE TOOK DURING HER B'DAY AT ATSON.











Above Your Imagination
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